Casey In The Desert of Numb:
“I was not in a good place in the fall of 2014. I was tired, stressed, not motivated, careless, lacked enthusiasm, and my wife and I had both agreed that our marriage was not at its best.
“The best way I could describe it was, ‘I feel numb.’
“To say those words, for me, was significant because that is not at all who I wanted to be or ever was.
“Before this desert season, I enjoyed living a life of passion, optimism, courage, and vision. I’d be the guy leaning forward in meetings, getting people fired up about something important, and having the energy to help people as needs came along.
“Over time, I wasn’t any of those things, and, in fact, I felt myself growing cold and dismissive of needs as they arose around me. I couldn’t get mad, sad, excited, or happy.
What Would Casey Do About it?
“Having grown up in the church as a pastor’s kid, and having been a pastor myself for over 10 years, I didn’t feel that I could or wanted to turn to the church.
“I’d had a recent experience [with the church] that was vastly disappointing and my wounds were not bleeding, but very tender. I had my guard up, and had grown callous to anything missional or spiritual. It was hard for me to feel God at all – especially at church.
“After several months of going through it on my own (and processing with my wife and some close friends), my pastor at our local church said, ‘I got a guy’ that you should meet with. He connected me with Randy.
“As I drove to the first meeting with Randy, I had a glimmer of hope because I thought, ‘Maybe this is the start of the turn around.’ And, it was.
Our First Meeting:
“Our first meeting, we went through the SASHET framework [Note: SASHET is an acronym for six major emotions we may experience – Sad, Angry, Scared, Happy, Excited, Tender. It can be a great tool for discovering what we are experiencing internally. Our emotions are often like gauges showing/warning us of what is going on inside that we may need to take a look at. If we pay attention to them, God often brings to the surface issues He wants us to address]. We very quickly identified that I had a mountain of unprocessed sadness that I had been neglecting.
“Randy went on to explain that when we try to suppress a particular emotion, we end up suppressing all emotion – leaving ourselves cold, numb, and unable to experience life. We shut ourselves off. That’s what I had done.
“I remember driving home after the first session and talking with my wife for several hours about it – and I felt the door starting to open.
Several Months Later:
“In the past several months as I’ve met with Randy, there have been too many realizations and changes to mention. I will say that I am no longer numb. There was a moment in church a few weeks ago, when we started to sing a song, and I couldn’t stop myself from crying. I felt the words and music in a very deep place.
“Having not experienced a depth of connection with God for a very long time, I knew that I was and am on the path to healing. My marriage is in a better place, my calling is clearer, the path ahead seems bright, and I feel more attentive to the world around me.
“I’m beyond thankful for this ministry, and to all those who have made this opportunity possible. Thank you.” – Casey Bankord
Randy’s Random Thoughts:
Casey is too great an asset for the Kingdom to be sidelined, so I’m very proud of him for taking the necessary steps to break out of the numbness and into deeper connection with the Lord.
One of the major hopes/goals of this ministry is to help people experience deeper connection and intimacy with the Lord. Out of that intimacy flows identity and then purpose.
I can’t wait to see what on-going impact this experience has in Casey’s life and in the lives of those around him, as he continues to pass on the things he received.
Thank You:
Thank you so much for your continued prayers and support. I hope you will pray for Casey as he continues his journey of discovering his new life after the numb.
In His Love,
Randy
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