Legacy Shepherding Ministries, Inc. – November 2008
“It’s all about love,” was one of my mentor Sheryl Fleisher’s favorite sayings. Life is ultimately about love – learning how to give and receive love (in relationship with God, others, and ourselves) to ever-deepening degrees, in every hidden layer of our being.
As we grow in love, we live more fulfilled lives. As we grow in love, we become more powerful change agents in the world.
Sheryl had a very loving and intentional way of getting at the roots of things inside me that were holding me back. For two years she journeyed with me. Through that time my intimacy with God deepened, my capacity to love expanded, and my shepherding became more empowered.
We all have things that are holding us back. Sometimes all it takes is having someone journey with us so we can allow God to remove those barriers that have held us down for far too long.
I met Mike O’Donnell in July of 2007. Mike was 28 years old and was co-leading a missional community within a 20something ministry.
It was obvious from the start that Mike was a man of integrity who loved the Lord and desired to make a difference with his one and only life.
Yet Mike, like myself, had things inside him that were (and are) holding him back from intimate union with God and living out his unique design with care-free abandon.
In our first meeting, Mike was very vulnerable and honest about some deep wounds in his past that caused him to feel restricted internally.
One of the physical manifestations of his internal angst was his fingernails. Mike bit his fingernails. He didn’t just bite the ends of his fingernails, he bit down on them, into the middle of them.
Mike told me he hid his hands so that no one would see his fingernails. He felt so ashamed. He couldn’t stop.
I asked if he would let me see his nails. He seemed reluctant, but said he would.
I held out my hands, which felt like a bold step for me being that we’d just met, and he placed his fingers sheepishly in my hands.
His nails were severely abused. Mike couldn’t look at me.
I recalled the numerous times Jesus touched people who came to him. Touch can be so healing.
I took my thumbs and gently touched each nail.
Mike started to cry. He was being seen in his hidden-ness and shame, and being met with love.
I encouraged him to let himself feel whatever it was that was bringing tears. (Tears can lead us to tender places within us where we need to receive God’s redemptive love. If we allow ourselves to feel, it opens those tender places up to new possibilities).
Mike began to cry harder. He said he hadn’t cried in front of anyone in years.
I asked him to close his eyes and feel God’s love for him. He soaked in God’s love and cried as I held his fingers and touched his nails.
Then I asked him to look me in the eyes. He had a hard time doing that.
I spoke words of affirmation to him as I looked in his eyes, sending words of love to the deep shame within.
Over the past year, as Mike has brought more and more of himself to God, he has been experiencing radical healing and transformation – a requirement for great spiritual leadership.
His nails were a symptom of what was going on inside. Today, his nails are healing – almost completely healed. It’s amazing!
Sometime during the year, Mike wrote:
“I now understand that my deep roots of guilt and shame have held me captive and limited my capacity to love myself and others.
“Allowing God to love me in the areas of my deepest insecurities results in me feeling a new sense of freedom.
“I’m a changed person through this experience and hope others can have the same opportunity that I have had.
“I now value more than anything for people to be transparent with each other at deep levels. We as Christians need to discuss dark, untold issues, to bring about healing and allow these issues to be brought into the light [where they can be transformed by God’s love and grace].”
As Mike continued to be internally transformed, within him grew a healthy desire to give away what he had been given – a natural overflow of love. Freed up love has to flow. It has to take action. It has to love the world, “for God so loved the world” and we are made in God’s image.
This year, Mike accepted a teaching position at an inner-city Chicago school – a challenging job he feels called to.
His stories about the school have been amazing. Many out-of-control students are softening as they hear Mike’s life-giving words of affirmation and empowerment. Words they haven’t been hearing. Mike is reflecting Jesus by building them up and helping them experience the good news of their beloved-ness.
Recently, Mike began meeting with a 25 year-old man named Scott.
Scott is very excited about meeting with Mike. He is being challenged in ways he has never been challenged before. I can tell he is already feeling the difference love and truth make when aimed directly at our hidden issues and the secret places we don’t often talk about in church. Scott is experiencing true transformation.
Scott told me he is excited about the future possibility of meeting with someone who he can pour into. He already has a natural, healthy desire to pass it on and bless others. The legacy goes on.
Would you consider partnering with me in impacting the next-generation by providing financial support? Your contributions will be tax-deductible through Legacy Shepherding Ministries, Inc.
Blessings,
Randy
Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!
Enjoy the Fall Season!
(Todd turned 30!)
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For more details about the ministry check out the web-site at: legacyshepherding.org
Contact me at: randy@legacyshepherding.org
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